it's 6:17 pm, on March 24, 2002 - the pain of imagined loss.

~

As Delenn says, "wait a while, and the wheel turns."

At least, that's how she tells it. She, however, was trying to seduce John Sheridan, so it's sketchy. Someone in love will say anything.

I'm feeling this, intense sort of loss, right now. Like, so desperate I can't even begin to think about it, I have to approach it from another angle in case I start to hyperventilate.

The story goes like this: there was a caravan, an honest-to-god caravan, getting together. This august. Most of you probably know about it. And, see. Someone said they couldn't afford it.

So. but. it's. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't.

Chris, sometimes, feels he has a tribe of one.

~*~

I wish, I wish Sheila were around right now. there's something in me, maybe, that needs absorbing, or. Because, see, my dreams of being a gypsy were being fufilled. But what's the point, right, if you don't. If.

This isn't about, Cathy dropping out. This is about, I don't know what this is about. Loss. A lot of loss. This is about grief.

Mel talked about hating herself, because of self-sabotage. Self-sabotage, then, is another form of addiction, maybe. Maybe. If you squint.

Chris, sometimes, feels he has a tribe of one.

I feel weak, today. Because I want something to soften this imagined blow, something to take away this sting. Ashlan and I have punctuation; I trust Sheila. It. I can't. I can't.

Chris, sometimes, feels he has a tribe of one.

I got a letter, once, that said "these two lines are running through my head". I'm. I can't. I can't. Chris, sometimes, feels he has a tribe of one.

Anyway. Just wanted to update on the loss. The pain of imagined loss. no more caravan.

~

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what would sith be nostalgic about anyway - November 24, 2015
moving truck dilemma - October 28, 2015
- - July 19, 2015
- - July 01, 2015
bruise - June 29, 2015

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