it's 1:04 am, on June 06, 2002 - lost and found.
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The rocks got slipperier as he went farther out, waves washing over his feet in icy bursts of pain, and the gaps between the rocks got larger. He had to choose his way carefully, and he had to turn back and go a different way more than once when the rocks gaped too widely for him to even think of crossing. He was out farther than he knew he should be, out farther than was safe, and he didn't look back at the shore because he knew he didn't want to know how far away he was. He could swim, but the ocean was freezing and rough and he should have turned back, but he was so close to the end and he kept going.
The last rock was small and tilted, a little lower than the rest, and he had to steady himself with one hand when he stepped down. He was standing in water now up to his ankles, and the waves that crashed against him came up to his knees and even higher once, and he had to reach back and brace himself again. He stood back up slowly, carefully, and looked out.
It wasn't quiet out there, because the waves smacked against the rocks over and over again, a loud wet sound, but it felt quiet somehow. He felt quiet. It wasn't a good kind of quiet exactly, but he wanted to feel it. He thought maybe he needed to. He had lost something, and maybe it was something nobody else would understand, maybe it was something stupid and small but it had been his and he had wanted it and he had had it and now he didn't have it anymore, and no matter what anybody else said that was a loss. That was loss.
When he looked straight ahead all he could see was gray and gray, the ocean and the sky, and a bright flicker of white every now and then where the waves foamed. The waves were choppy around him and the rock was uneven and he had to think about how he was standing to stay upright. His legs were burning and prickling with cold but he guessed he'd get used to it soon. Soon he wouldn't feel it anymore. Justin stood still and looked at the gray and the gray and thought about keeping his footing and waited to not feel anything.
--Lost and Found by Amber.
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