it's 4:22 am, on December 10, 2002 - I love you.

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So, there's this Firefly episode, where every time I watch it I cry tears of. of, I don't even know. tears of family. Because Joss Whedon, like so many of us, is deeply deeply in love with the idea of building family out of people you choose, rather than people you're given.

you surround yourself with the people that make up your life, that you're in love with. you surround yourself with your tribe, and all the stories he tells in Firefly are about that. this is maybe why I'm so obsessed with this show.

And every time Mal says "y'all are gonna be here when I wake up?", and then when Book answers, "We'll be here," he says, "good. that's good." I tear up. I tear up and I think, 'yes.'

Because, it's. Everyone just means so much. Building a family, that's what life is about. And it's the holidays so yet another post wherein I say things like this, I don't feel so bad, since the holidays are a time of family. and I don't care if my family is spread across the globe, if they don't all know each other and if we're never all in the same place at the same time.

Every time I hear Mal say "good, that's good," I tear up. I can't help it. because he's built himself a tribe and that's the best story anyone can tell, because that's the best life anyone can have. that's the only thing for life.

sometimes it feels like I don't really have anything much to say in this journal -- definitely not really in any other journal -- because I'm just repeating myself again, I know. Do y'all get tired of me saying "I love you" so much? I'm sorry, if you do. I mean, I used to think saying it all the time cheapened it, like, made it into just some habit. just words. but, see, I can't help it. like Justin's 'thank you'? I mean it every time.

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what would sith be nostalgic about anyway - November 24, 2015
moving truck dilemma - October 28, 2015
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bruise - June 29, 2015

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