it's 7:48 pm, on August 14, 2008 - and completely revealing, divine mysteries.

~

realized that, for the first time since I'd heard OLP's 'clumsy', I could point to the thing that sunk beneath my skin. The train, of course, didn't define my mental chaos. it didn't give me PTSD or any other kind of mental illness. it just helped define what was already there, shaped part of it.

divine mysteries? no. but after having seen k for the first time since 2004; having voluntarily and consciously put myself in the position with no excuses, I finished the achilles story.

-

Achilles chews a dirty fingernail. He frowns. "You frighten yourself?"

"No," and then I admit, "Maybe."

"Why?"

Good question. No good answer. "I-- I wanted something again." A pause, and then, "would you have gone?"

Achilles - wisely - doesn't answer me directly. "The mother of all bad ideas," he says instead, without humour. "You should have known better."

"I should have," I agree. A dog howls outside, in the dark, and rain splatters; I focus on repeating tonelessly in my head, lost, and not, found.

-

~

The current mood of lisewilliams@geocities.com at www.imood.com

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what would sith be nostalgic about anyway - November 24, 2015
moving truck dilemma - October 28, 2015
- - July 19, 2015
- - July 01, 2015
bruise - June 29, 2015

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